3 Simple Ways to Teach Children Kindness
November 13th is World Kindness Day, but we don’t really need or shouldn’t need a day to remind us to be kind to others as well as to ourselves. We often get asked, do you need to teach kids how to be kind, and if so, how do you? Although kindness is an abstract concept we have outlined three ways to teach this social concept to children.
Teach children about emotions. Teaching children to identify feelings in their bodies as emotions, labeling those feelings and emotions and being able to recognize those emotions is a pivotal step in developing children’s emotional intelligence. Once they have developed the concept of various emotions they will then be able to recognize those emotions in books, tv, and from others. A great way to practice this is to ask “how do you think that made someone feel?” gets kids thinking about emotions by relating their personal experiences to others. And before you know it, we’ve also begun teaching children about empathy - we love a 2 for 1 moment!
Model kindness and respect. We stay it often, but developmentally, modeling is the main way children learn. Children are natural observers of everything parents and caregivers do and say, so make sure you are practicing kindness and respect to all family members, friends and coworkers, even those we pass by on the street. Children pick up on these actions as ways they should interact with others and will be more likely to be kind and respectful to others. A prime example of modeling is when we hear a child say something or act in an unbecoming manner. Our first thought it “they must be learning that at home!” Modeling goes both ways, it can be used for good and bad. And when we model the behavior we want to see in our children, they take that into the real world. So make sure you are kind and respectful in what you do and say, especially around your children.
Encourage and praise kind behavior. Prompt children to be kind and recognize when they are doing so. Before you know, it will become second nature. Then make sure to praise them some more. We all love positive feedback, and children are no different. Lets make sure to recognize when they are doing something we love and they will be more likely to repeat it in the future. Doing so reinforces that kindness is valued in your home and in your family and that you support kind behavior.
When you practice these three lesson, it helps children build their emotional memory and emotional intelligence. Our emotional memory helps guides our reasoning behind actions as well as our future behavior. Emotional memory is oftentimes the most meaningful reason for changing our behavior or increasing our awareness of our behavior. So make sure teaching kids about kindness and practicing acts of kindness is something you do everyday, even if it starts today - its never too late to build that emotional memory of kindness for them.
